ADHD and Job Loss: Real Advice for Rebuilding Confidence and Finding Your Path
Sometimes the most powerful insights don’t come from experts. They come from a late-night scroll through a support group post that hits a little too close to home.
Recently, I came across a post in an online ADHD community where someone shared their experience of losing a job they loved after just a few months. It was the third job in a row they’d lost. In this one, they finally felt more confident in themselves, until they didn’t.
They spoke openly about how hard it is to keep jobs despite doing their best. The rejection. The burnout. The lack of confidence. The constant fear of messing up. So many of us know that feeling.
They wrote:
I start to build confidence and give my all, but have a horrible time paying attention to detail, which is a contributing factor of why coworkers look down at me. I have two children and I have no idea what I’m going to do. Self-esteem is very low because I feel like I’ll never fit in or succeed because of my ADHD and the way my brain works. It doesn’t matter how many notes I take. Once people label me as an airhead it’s over. Label sticks, and I am considered the weak link.
I can't think of a single job that I would be successful at, that pays enough money to survive, and builds confidence, not anxiety.
Oof. I’ve had that feeling.
I’ve been fired. One of the jobs I was fired from was the one that inspired me to become an ADHD coach. The pressure of that job worsened my anxiety and ADHD, and I had to find a way through it. By the end of week one, I knew it wouldn’t last, that I’d either be fired or quit. I had constant fear of messing up. I was told, “I shouldn’t have to praise you for doing your job.” I endured six months of being bullied and gaslighted before I was made a scapegoat for another team’s oversight. Blame the newbie temp. I was trying to fix their blunder, but I was unaware of how big a blunder they made until I realized that “the thing” was related to something for which they could have created an entire marketing strategy. Instead, it seemed like someone handed me something before it was ready for my part.
I deserved to be let go from a job where I struggled. My impostor syndrome and desire to be perfect had paralyzed me. That experience helped me get over my impostor syndrome because I didn’t want that to happen again. Each time I’ve been fired (three as an adult and a couple of retail jobs as a shy teenager who wasn’t good at selling), I’ve learned from the experience.
Job loss is common with ADHD. So is being made the scapegoat.
The original poster shared how embarrassed and humiliated they felt. I’ve been there too.
My primary issues are: retaining new information, asking the same questions, making simple mistakes, relying on others too much, caring what others think of me, and hypersensitivity to perceived criticisms.
That hit hard.
Dozens of people replied, reflecting on their own journeys, sharing what helped, what didn’t, and how they started to rebuild.
That conversation inspired this post. Not because there’s one answer, but because it reminded me how deeply we all need to hear this:
You’re not broken. You don’t need to be like everyone else. You just need a system, and sometimes a space, that works for you.
What Came Up Again and Again
ADHD shows up differently in all of us, and you are not limited by your diagnosis. These were some of the most common themes from that conversation:
1. “I Don’t Even Know What I’m Good At Anymore”
So many people admitted that after burnout or job loss, they lost sight of their strengths. They felt like they used to be capable but weren’t sure what they could handle anymore.
What helped:
Asking friends, family, or past colleagues for honest feedback
Taking strength-based assessments like CliftonStrengths to get language for what comes naturally
Reflecting not just on past jobs, but on what parts of those jobs felt good
2. “I Can’t Do Detail-Oriented Work. Does That Mean I’m Unemployable?”
Absolutely not, but it’s a common fear. Many people said they struggled in roles with lots of paperwork, rigid protocols, or performance metrics based on consistency and precision.
What helped:
Finding roles that emphasize big-picture thinking, people skills, or creative problem-solving
Building in personal systems such as checklists, timers, or reminders to support weak points instead of trying to eliminate them
Reframing struggles with details as a mismatch rather than a failure
3. “Every Job Feels Like Too Much”
For many, it’s not just the job. It’s the invisible load of masking, people-pleasing, and trying to meet unspoken expectations while managing executive dysfunction.
What helped:
Reassessing what success looks like—for you, not for others
Giving yourself permission to choose ease over ambition, at least for a while
Taking short-term or lower-pressure roles to rebuild confidence before re-entering more demanding environments
4. “Where Do I Even Start Again?”
When you’ve cycled through jobs or taken a break, returning can feel overwhelming. The shame alone is heavy.
What helped:
Volunteering, freelancing, or taking on a small project to warm up and regain structure
Looking into state or community programs that offer employment coaching or retraining
Writing a list of tasks you enjoy, not job titles, to help steer your search in a values-based direction
5. “How Can I Keep Believing I’m Not Broken?”
That was the real question underneath it all, even when people didn’t say it outright.
What helped:
Remembering that your worth isn’t tied to your job stability
Surrounding yourself with people (even strangers online) who reflect your potential back to you
Letting go of jobs that don’t let you show up as your full self
Final Thoughts: There Is No One Job, But There Is a Path
This post isn’t about finding the job. It’s about remembering that you have options—even if they’re not what you expected.
Some people flourish in high-pressure environments. Others need low-stimulation settings. Some love structure. Others crave freedom. ADHD isn’t one thing, so your career path doesn’t have to be either.
If you’re in a season of feeling lost, discouraged, or stuck, take a breath. Pause. Rebuild slowly.
Don’t give up.
Instead:
Assess your strengths
Learn what energizes you
Take advantage of free workshops, webinars, and library books
Talk to people
Let your network help you
Get out of your comfort zone—just a little
You’ve got this.
